NLP

Score with a Coach - Reprint from Gulf News 06/09/2007 | By Maey El Shoush,

Unlike a therapist, a life coach approaches the problems faced by a client more like a friend would – but, with more objectivity. By asking them powerful questions and raising their levels of confidence, life coaches are often able to help their clients see opportunity where they often failed to see one.

“The right kind of attitude goes a long way in ensuring a happier and more successful life. And life coaches help clients do just that – by teaching them to be more positive.”

If you are one of those who limits his capabilities by worrying about making a living instead of enjoying life and living in the moment, it’s time you sought the help of a life coach to organise your thoughts and achieve your dreams.

“A life coach identifies the strengths of individuals, making them discover hidden aspects of their personalities. Once they believe in themselves, their thoughts, words and actions become positive and bring about a big difference in their lives,” says Dr Samir Mohammad, UAE-based coach and celebrity trainer.

Facilitating change

Some may feel this sounds larger than life, but in reality, it can be as simple as creating a specific surrounding to help individuals believe in themselves, he says.

Some seek the guidance of a life coach because their lives have either come to a standstill or have somehow lost direction, says Dave Crane, a Dubai-based life designer. “These [feelings] are predominant in career, life, purpose, money, health, friends and family, self-esteem, confidence and romance.”

Crane believes all these aspects are intertwined, and that true happiness can be achieved by successfully altering just one of the factors.

Using neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) Crane tracks and then anchors success into clients leaving them with the tools to look after themselves.

“It’s like the old saying: ‘you can give a man a fish and he will eat for a day, but if you teach him to fish, he will eat for a lifetime’,” Crane says. The life designer also aims to map out future options and possibilities for his clients.

“I can take them back to reset old memories and forward to experience dreams coming true,” he says. “Your mind can’t tell the difference between what is real and what is vividly imagined, it responds equally to both, so this is very powerful.”

Great expectations

Another Dubai-based life coach, German-born Silke Rehman, says though Dubai offers many career opportunities, some people do not have the time to sit back and think about what they want. “There are expectations from the family, society, culture and work; there are too many ‘shoulds’ in our mind rather than actual personal goals,” she says. “As a life coach, I try to unlock a person’s potential by asking them questions and allowing them to find the answer. I have seen many who have had those ‘aha!’ moments.”

Mohammad holds out a similar opinion. “We spend our life analysing why we react in a certain way, why we chose Plan B over Plan A, or why our neighbour drives a Ferrari while we drive that mediocre car. The life coach transforms these negative thoughts into strengths, which then reflect in positive results.”

Jerry Seavey, mind development expert, master NLP trainer and president of the international NLP certification training company MindBridge Institute, says life coaching is catching up in the UAE and the entire Middle East.

Courses on offer

“NLP, positive thinking, coaching and mind enhancement are in demand because of the rapid changes taking place throughout the world,” says Seavey, considered one of the foremost developers in the field and one who brought his expertise to Dubai.

Endorsing the growing interest in NLP, the NLP International Professional Coach Certification, a 12-day course, was held at the Jumeirah Rotana Hotel in Dubai recently.

Seavey says there are two reasons why people want to obtain NLP certificaton: “One is to become a self-employed professional as a coach. It is a dream career and one of the fastest growing professions in the world today.

“The second is to gain new skills, making you more valuable and successful in your current career. It also helps those who want to improve specific situations or make a difference in peoples’ lives.”

Friend and guide

“The relationship between client and coach is anchored on trust and confidentiality. The coach is there to push, cajole, support, be with and, most importantly, to listen,” Rehman says.

“[The coach] is a partner devoted 100 per cent to success [of the client].”

But, life coaching is not about preaching. Crane and the others say they practise all that they advise their clients to do.

“If I want anything, I have to get it myself. Revolutionaries don’t ask for permission and at one point, our heroes also doubted their own abilities,” Crane says.

His advice to people is to believe they are capable of brilliance and deserve to have the things they want out of life.

Mohammad’s strategy is slightly different. “Before I can say problem, I say solution and it makes my day wonderful,” he says.

And the collective advice from the experts? One of the worst things you can do is put your dreams on hold till you suddenly become older and say: “I wish”.

Though it may seem as though a ‘life coach’ is only a more glamorous term for “therapist”, Mohammad lays out the difference – a therapist, especially psychiatrists and clinical advisers, incorporates a medical approach and tries to cure a problem with medicine.

Coach, not therapist

“I have been in the medical field and I know the fear and mental block people can have when they visit a doctor.

That’s where a life coach has the upper hand,” he says. “We are normal human beings with qualities that will help you achieve what you want.”

Crane puts the difference in perspective. “A therapist fixes the broken parts and mends you while a life coach assumes you are fully fit but want to be better and works on how to get you there,” he says.

As a life designer, Crane says he can offer the best of both worlds by integrating NLP and hypnotherapy to dig into the subconscious mind and quickly deal with unresolved issues. Once they’ve been dealt with, they can be used to realise success.

Attitude and Objectivity

Rehman says she is often asked why one should see a coach when there are friends and family around to help in most cases.

Coaches are almost like friends and confidants, but Rehman is quick to point out that “friends and family lack the objectivity, which a coach can provide, and friends habitually offer quick advice rather than asking powerful questions”.

The outlook, attitude and objectivity and skills that life coaches bring with them, makes them popular with clients. And it shows because interest in this field is growing rapidly.

Results: Positive outcomes

Those who have hired a life coach have experienced the following results:

• Finding passion and excitement again
• Realising potential
• Getting along better with others
• Achieving and exceeding personal goals
• Greater self-confidence
• Breaking bad habits

Contact: Help at hand

Some life coaching options available in the UAE:

Dr Samir Mohammad, personality makeover coach and celebrity trainer drsamirm@gmail.com

Dave Crane, life designer and motivational speaker dave@lifedesigner.com

Silke Rehman, life coach coaching@developandgrow.com

Jerry Seavey, mind development expert and president of MindBridge Training Institute – jerry@mindbrigetrainings.com; find out how you can become a professional coach through training sessions by MindBridge UAE: 971 (0)4 319 9030

www.mindbridgetrainings.com

NLP Coach Certification & NLP Practitioner Comprehensive Training

Predictions

by Jerry Seavey

“I will tell you your future!” that familiar Inner-Voice said. (That is the kind of phrase that the Voice knows will get attention amid the constant chatter and activity of the inner mind.)
“Listen while I tell you what can be….. what might be….. and what will be.”

“This year will be the most important year of your life… so far, because all the years in the past have already been lived as fully as you were able to at those times. It is what you do or do not do this year that will predict your future.”

“I will also tell you something that is a certainty for you next year.” the Voice continued. “It will be a year of change. Change for yourself, your family, your country, your planet.”

“In fact, there is never a year where changes do not occur. It is the way of life, the way of evolution, the way of the physical universe. And, since change is something you can definitely count on happening this year, I recommend that you utilize your option to choose the direction some of the changes will take. If you don’t choose and then act on those choices, the direction of change will be made for you, and you may not like it.”

My attention began to wander off onto other distractions. What the Voice said was an accurate forecast for my future; but, like many fortune tellers, the predictions were common sense and generalizations.

“Would you like very specific predictions for your future?” The Voice whispered.
My attention snapped back to full alert…. Would I win the lottery, get a new job, fall in love, reduce weight?

“To obtain a preview of your future simply make a list of the goals you want to achieve,” the Voice said. “Then visualize them daily with desire, belief and expectancy. Work at the inner levels of mind to get guidance and insight, and in the physical world to create and act upon opportunities to bring about the desired goals.”

“It has been estimated that most people will achieve 90% of the goals that they work on persistently. The problem is 90% of the population do not set goals. Their future is unpredictable and often not to their liking. It is not enough to simply know your future, it is what you do to create your future that counts.”

The Voice then added, “Happy New Year!”

Jerry Seavey, MindBridge International NLP Training Institute

Why work with a coach? A coach won’t do the work for you, but here is how a coach can help launch you to the next level:

1. A coach can be a confidant. You can tell your coach things you wouldn’t tell others, because a coach is trained to understand and be non-judgmental and keep it confidential.

2. A coach can help you see your blind spots. Everyone, even the coach, has personal areas that are out of view or awareness until someone points them out. A coach is perfectly poised to perform this critical function.

3. A coach can provide objective feedback. Other people may have agendas. Your coach has your best interests in mind in providing feedback and counsel to you.

4. A coach provides another set of eyes. Even the top performers in the world have coaches to help them see what they themselves can’t see.

5. A coach can keep you accountable. Your coach can help you take on more responsibility by having you report weekly on your accomplishments and initiatives.

6. A coach can be a sounding board. Your coach can be another set of ears as you talk about the things that are bothering you. As you hear yourself have a conversation new personal realizations emerge.

7. A coach can be another source of creative ideas. You can brainstorm and try out new ideas, behaviors and mental processes as your coach provides a safe place to experiment.

8. A coach can help you create your vision. Your coach can assist you in developing your plans for success based on your values, personal strengths, background and assets.

9. A coach can help celebrate your successes and be a source of strength when you fail. Your coach can be a supportive and nurturing source of energy.

10. A coach can help you process life. Life is a process and a good coach can assist you in reviewing and reframing what happens in your business, your sports and your life!

For more information on hiring a NLP Professional Life Coach click here

Jerry Seavey – USA – NLP Personal & Professional Life Coach – +919 771 2227

Michael Todd – UAE – NLP Personal & Professional Life Coach +971 (0)50 153 5213

Listen Up!

The ability to listen, understand and influence are the most valuable traits in our society.

A 2003 survey of corporate Human Resource managers revealed that, of all employees that have been laid off or passed over for promotion during the previous year 85% of them got penalized … not for lack of job competence, but for lack of people skills.

NLP is a superb collection of ‘people skills’, based on a deep understanding of how the mind really works – how we actually create our understanding of reality in our brains. NLP goes way beyond the traditional theories of psychology – it includes elements of anthropology, hypnosis, neuroscience, linguistics, somatic expression, spirituality and much more.

Socrates

If you want to help your peers, team members, and even managers get unstuck or move forward ask more Socratic questions.

The best questions are open-ended and thought provoking. Here are a few examples:

“What do you want to have happen in the next three months… and why?

“What has lead you to this conclusion?… Are there opposing views?… If so, what are they and what are their merits?”

“What are the interests of the various parties and will this solution meet these needs?”

When it comes to coaching, the more questions the better. For those of us who are comfortable sharing our opinions and ideas, our challenge is to resist giving advice. Advice may be helpful at times, but the most effective coaching will facilitate the thinking process of the other person, which is best accomplished in the tradition of Socrates.

Would you trust flying on an airline with a pilot who had learned to fly only by reading books about it or from internet and tele-classes training? There are many things that are better learned by ‘direct, hands-on experience. Coaching is one of those skills that is best learned with live, face to face interaction, observation and feedback.

When taking an NLP Training it is essential to experience live interaction with both the trainer and others in the course that will be your ‘clients’ throughout the training. It is considerably more effective for learning exceptional NLP skills to be in a class room situation as compared to internet, tele-classes or just book learning.

The MindBridge NLP Training will give you personal instruction by world-renowned trainers, developers and authors Jerry Seavey and Marilou Seavey, who have more than thirty five years of training experience. (see ‘who we are‘.